2024-07-13 - Cowardice and What That May Be - 6.6

The roaring and swearing is new and so very frightening - Myrcelleth couldn’t help but shy away from it, but not enough, not enough not to listen, not to crane their little neck to hear exactly what they are talking about. It is not much that he understands - colours again, saying that they wanted a brown, ‘forces’ greenriders, whatever that meant, hatching last, flying someone. The last one, at the very least, Myrcelleth understood more than the others. His bronze Father was so proud of his Flight that it was disgusting. The way this one said it was equally so. Must it always be this way? It did not sound like flight was anything but something to be forced, to be captured in, to hate. Is that what she meant when spitting fire in his face and insulting his rider? Did his rider forcefully have a Flight with greenriders?

Is a Flight nothing but desperately trying to get away from someone who wants to claim you, to spit in your face and have a clutch to mould in their own image?

The physical aspect of the fight weighs on Myrcelleth as well - the way they are looking to bite, to claw, tangling together in what was almost a dance to the most violent of songs. Their own screaming. It was horrific. Despite this, there is almost a certain beauty to it, exactly like a dance, it looks like it would feel good to overpower someone like that. He can’t help but cheer for the green - not only for his own fondness for greens, but because she feels right.

Myrcelleth would be angry too, they find. They would be so, so angry to be forced into something without their wish, especially a Flight. That blue was horrible for even saying that. He said something about ‘giving her what she likes’ in the same tone as the Flight and he had to wonder if that was related. It all seemed painful. Despite Mother’s almost… detached observation of the fight, Myrcelleth hopes the green managed to get the last few bites in.

Finally, the thing that stuck with Myrcelleth the most, like a leech feeding on fear. Coward - it was a hated term. Snivelling coward of a woman. He knew, he knew that that was him. That this term would be whispered behind their back, maybe to their face as well. In that, the greens reaction is similarly comforting, saying that N’hi tries so hard but… she doesn’t say that she is good. Surely that couldn’t be true, not with the sheer vicious, righteous anger that the green shouted it. Surely.

He hopes that he can do enough good to be defended like that.