2024-06-27 - Musings on size, of all things

So small and adorable

It sticks, because something about the feelings associated with these words is familiar.

Big, Violet Skies has learned, is a quality of mother. It is also a quality of night, the absence of the light cast by other minds.

Small it has less understanding of, and so it tries to develop a conception of what that might be. Small is ...protected? Possessed? By mother. It is less overwhelming than mother. It is a less overwhelming presence than mother.

It is small?

It must be, for the others are small, and it has learned that it shares more commonality with them than the great being whose comings and goings mark the passing of time.

Small is ...good?

It remembers the affection mother had for the being she referred to as small. Clearly, mother regards it as such. But does Violet Skies think small is good?

Does Violet Skies want to be ...small?

It doesn't think so. Small things are held, loved, protected, but... big things are what do the holding. It wants to be like mother, to gather all these tiny others into its embrace and hoard them all to itself, listen to all these whispered conversations until its mind is fit to burst from all the new words and concepts and feelings and stories...

No. It definitely doesn't want to be small.