2024-06-06 - Two infinities. 4.1.2

For a time, it was alone.

Mother was gone.

This happened sometimes, it had discovered. This discovery had been of world-splintering consequence. If Mother could leave but it remained that meant there was more than Mother. This idea was as terrifying as it was illuminating. The spark still burned without that fire. Still, it was a lonely spark without that great blaze, a pinpoint of bright consciousness amongst the otherwise indeterminate blankness of Not. Returning was relief. Warmth returned along with Mother, a sun breaking the horizon after a night of long-dark cold. Absence made the return of that vast presence a comfort, dulling some of the overwhelming muchness of Mother that was all it had known before.

The more aware it became of Absence, the more it noticed its subtleties. Mother's warmth would fade, a setting sun heralding the oncoming shift from There to Gone. This was accepted. It was a force, an inexorable phenomenon. Her return was much the same. Terror was unnecessary, forgotten and left behind when Return became constant. Adrift upon a starless sea only to be anchored by the dawn-bright sky.

Caught between two infinities. Here and there. Heat and cold. Day and night. Mother and... other?

For a time, this, too, was accepted.

For a time, this, too, was enough.