2024-06-03 - the Cold has no place here

the awareness comes not all at once, but gradually. sometimes it is momentary, the merest of annoyances in the Warmth that is this existence. sometimes it is not noticed at all, for the Warmth returns quickly, and there is no concept of time besides.

and then... an Awareness that something is Wrong.

the feeling is new, not even truly an emotion, because that is an unknown that hasn't quite solidified, but it is a feeling.

there was once Warmth and now there is Not. the word is not immediately supplied, and yet it is there all the same. Cold. Cold. it stirs something that gives pause, and a Thought. there have not been many Thoughts, since there has not been much Awareness other than Warmth and Mother. but now there is a thought of Alone.

that is not true; there are others. others? not Warmth. not Mother. but others all the same, giving faint warmth. but not the Warmth of Mother. this is a distinction that bears repeating.

perhaps this first true Awareness creates the first Heat.

your Heat.

and all too soon, Mother and her Warmth returns, and all is right again.